Will I Ever See the Real You Again?
by Ailia Kate Kira
Summary: If had accepted your confession, would you still be by my side?" Mikan starts to wonder if she made the right decision in relation to her friendship with Natsume. ONE-SHOT.


**Hey everyone! Well, I shall get this started with. This isn't my first fanfic, BUT it is my first Gakuen Alice fanfic, so your opinions about it are really much appreciated. Without further ado, "Will I ever see the real you again?"**

**/*DISCLAIMER!!*/**

**I don't Gakuen Alice. I only own the idea of this fanfic and any grammar problems in it.**

**INSPIRATION OF FANFIC: Personal Life:D

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"Will I ever see the real you again?"

_by: liledormouse_

I can't help but wonder. If I had accepted your confession, would you still be by my side? That question has rung through my head again and again and to tell you the truth, it's strangling my way of life. I could think straight when times needed it, but whenever I pass by you, the question just rings more and louder in my head. I've always wished it would stop, but how? I've tried talking it over with friends and even tried to put myself in your shoes just to understand the change that occurred upon you. I remembered that confession like it just happened yesterday, yet it happened over 7 months ago.

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You were with me that day because I couldn't stand being around your best friend who I've dated for 5-months; the same best friend who broke my heart during the Christmas Party last year. Under the shining stars we stayed, on the soft blades of grass we sat and it was at that times you asked.

"Polka."

"It's Mikan, Natsume." I smiled annoyingly because of the nickname you gave me after taking a peek of my underwear, but of course, I've gotten used to it.

"Polka, do you still love Ruka?" The question was a shock to me because for Natsume to actually care about my feelings for his best friend, I couldn't help but cry. Of course, I still loved his best friend, Ruka. He was kind and had a warm personality especially towards animals, which I found cute. I knew that loving him until now when we're separated was wrong, especially that he had started anew by caring my best friend and his current girlfriend, Hotaru.

"If I were to say yes, what would you do?"

"You do know that he hurt you and even moved on with your best friend."

"I know." Yes, I knew what Natsume was saying was true. I'm not an idiot when it comes to what can be seen by the naked eye, but I can be idiot when it comes to love. Look at me, I'm crying on a starry night rather than admiring at its mystical view.

"What if…" I looked at Natsume, who seemed like he wanted to spill something out, yet at the same time was hesitant about it; it was a first for me to see Natsume hesitate with what he was about to do. "What if… I told you that I loved you?"

The question just hit me. Natsume Hyuuga, certified playboy of the school, yet at the same time heartthrob of the school, just said he loved me. Every girl wished a time like this would happen to them. Wait… scratch that… they'll do anything for that to happen to them. Some of them would even pay him, so he could just have sex with him. I don't even want to know how many times he's done it with a girl, but I'm not like every typical girl in the school.

I just chuckled as a starting to my reply. "Really Natsume, what a funny bone you have." I thought he would laugh with me, but no, what I got was an intense gaze from him that showed, so much of his emotions. I was taken aback by how serious he was with the statement then, a hesitant chuckle came out of me. "You weren't kidding?"

"Let me ask you this question Polka; have I ever said I love you to a girl?"

He did have a point for he dated girls, but he had never said those three special words to them; the girls though didn't care for all in their mind during those dates were, "I'm dating Natsume Hyuuga." or "Natsume Hyuuga is even better up close." Okay… sort of in the lines of that.

"No." It was a blunt no before I drifted on. "But, I can't accept your love for me." He was about to question me when I continued to carry on. "I only think of you as one of my best friends and more of a brotherly figure to me. We can never be for that reason and also because of Ruka."

Those were the words I told him, exactly on the lines of that. I remember him trying to lighten up the situation by talking about the stars and I really admire him for taking the defeat in the confession well. The days after the confession went really well, he was still the same person, cold-hearted but secretly cared inside for he still comforted me when I needed it.

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Now… I don't know what happened to you. This was a new school year and it was the same year where we weren't in the same class and you ended up being classmates with that Luna Koizumi. At first, I didn't mind because I knew you were over her, but what was saddening was that you became closer to her and you two ended up being boyfriend and girlfriend once again. At first, I could tolerate the status of your relationship because you still ate and hang out with us, your most awesome group. You were still that cold and caring person who helped me through my problems with Ruka and because of that I was slowly becoming on speaking terms with Ruka. But now… I don't what to think anymore.

You slowly attached yourself to that girlfriend of yours; at the same time, you slowly drifted away from us. Every day I would try to approach you just for my efforts to become fruitless for you were with Luna and every step I took that girlfriend of yours would glare at me. It was as if she was telling me to back off and not only did you allow her to do that, you were also smirking. Those times where you weren't with her and I tried to approach you, you would run off to a different direction or even worse, ignore my existence. Is knowing me that much of a pain to you already or are you Luna's little pet who's eating out the palm of her hand? I thought you were Natsume Hyuuga: filled with pride, would never give in and will never ever obey someone else; you were my best friend and confidante, but now… I just don't see the old you anymore.

Every one in the group agrees on this statement, even Ruka too. Permy even called you an asshole for abandoning the group just to be with your girlfriend, Luna who in Permy's opinion is just a slut. Hotaru even wanted to use the Baka Gun on you and I know she could, but she had her reasons why she couldn't use it. What those reasons are, I have no clue.

I wanted to tell you all of this, but I couldn't. As you sat at the other side of the cafeteria with your girlfriend, this was the sort of speech that was running across my mind. If I were to forget it, I would mentally slap myself and try to remembering it again because it is so much better to think about this rather than watch you two flirt off at the other side of the room. The flirting just made me become gloomy, which the group must've noticed because they sent Ruka to comfort me.

Oh… that was the other thing I wanted to tell you. A month after you started hanging around with Luna during lunch, Ruka confessed to me; I thought he was head over heels with Hotaru, but I found out Hotaru only dated him to shoot some sense back into him. It was the one thing that made me smile and really laugh once again after you ditched the group. Now that I think about it, you and Ruka just switched positions, but that isn't enough for me; I want all of us to be together once again.

Ruka came over to me and gave me a hug, which was kind of expected since it is Ruka we're talking about. He wiped my tears, which I didn't even notice and got rid of all my fears of you forgetting about me, but the question remains: why did you have to go? I smiled at the group.

"It's okay guys, don't mind me I just remembered stuff."

"Since you're crying, you must've been thinking about Natsume." Hotaru said. Typical Hotaru. To be such a genius in figuring out how I roll.

"Just forget about that asshole." Permy shouted out that every one else in the cafeteria heard her; fortunately there wasn't a teacher in the cafeteria because if there were, Permy would have been scolded right now. The unfortunate part, every one was now staring at us, even Natsume looked at us though from the looks of it, he was sort of distracted because Luna was trying to get his attention by tugging on his shirt and moving her hands all over his chest. It was one hell of a disgusting sight. The problem at hand, how do we get people to stop looking at us?

Koko tried to direct the people's attention away from us with a joke, but the only thing that did was make them laugh and beg Koko to tell more jokes. Anna and Nonoko tried redirecting the people's attention by pointing outside the window and saying Narumi was acting all pedophilic with a boy. When I took a look outside the window, what Anna and Nonoko said was really happening; I don't even want to go into details what Narumi was doing to the kid.

It got the attention of some people, but others just took one glance outside of the window and then went back to staring at us. Great… our group was in a pickle. We were about to send Ruka in and force him to create and animal stampede in the cafeteria just to get out until…

RRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG!!!!!

The fire alarm went off and every one was scrambling to get out of the cafeteria and counter flowing them were the teachers, who were trying to reach the source of the fire. Now that I think about it, if there's a fire, there's supposed to be smoke. I looked around the cafeteria and I couldn't see any fire or even smoke; maybe the sprinklers killed off the fire, but that would be highly unlikely because the sprinkler system just set off a few seconds ago.

Serina-sensei was leading the students out of the cafeteria when she caught sight of our group. She hurriedly went over to us asking if any of us had an injury because we weren't getting out of the cafeteria. Of course, none of us had physical injuries, but if Serina-sensei were willing to accept emotional injuries, then I would have said yes. Now knowing that none of us had any injuries, she frantically forced us out of the cafeteria at the start, but when we started to comply, she left us alone.

As I was exiting the cafeteria, I caught a sight of Natsume and our line of vision connected. He wasn't with Luna, which wasn't that surprising since the sprinkler system went of and slutty Luna wouldn't want her fake hair to be ruined. What was surprising to me was that he was smirking at me, but not an evil smirk; it was more of a happy kind of smirk. It then hit me; it was Natsume who set of the fire alarm. How could I have forgotten Natsume's fire alice! But the question of the day was why did he help the group he ditched?

I still question myself up until this day: if I had accepted your confession, would you still be by my side? Now that I think about it, after this incident, I've realized the answer; you still have the old you hidden very deep inside your heart and it's just that you prioritized your time over Luna over your time with us. Now I know, if you had to pick between saving your friends and saving Luna, I am sure you'll pick us; there's no doubt about it. Yet the question still remains with a modification: If I had accepted your confession, would the real you still stay with you?

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**Well… here you go. This is my first GA fanfic, so critique about this is very much appreciated. If you noticed the inspiration of this fanfic is my personal life, I shall clarify about that. It is like my personal life because the fanfic is concerned about accepting a confession, but whatever happened in this fanfic some happened for real and some didn't. Finally…**

**REVIEW!! :D**


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